Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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