What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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No, Sarah. You know your hooks scratch the keys.

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

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lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

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"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

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If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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poop.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

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Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

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Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

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What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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White NBA players.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops