- Anti Joke

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

Why couldn't the man lick his elbows? Because it is scientifically proven that over 98% of humans can not lick their elbows.

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

You know what's catchy? A cold

What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

One kid says I've had threw bottles of water and I haven't had to go to the bathroom. His friend says may have a urinary tract infection.

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

How many gay people does it take to make a football team? 11

No it doesnt..

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

thomas!!!!

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick