I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

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Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

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james hedge is gay did you know if you look at him you turn gay

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Why so serious? Your brother died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

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How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

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Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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