What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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whats long and black? a baton

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

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Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

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IMMA FIND YO ASS DO!!!!!

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

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What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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Frontbut-

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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miha kako si?

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Enough Red to share, RAWR! With me only though! But hey, do me a favor wear your glasses not your contact lenses. "That anime" do you watch anime? Or hentai or whatever?

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

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Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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