If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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