jumping jelly beans theirs a snake in my booties,, ooooooo har har ya ya youve got that one thing baby peace love and applesauce baby!!!!1

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roses are red violets are blue

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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like this if you think what ever you want to..

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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Why was George Washington buried in Virginia? Because he was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's rape??

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Laugh.

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Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops