A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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