Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

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okay so theres this guy.

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

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If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

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Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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Roses are red Roses are also white and Violets are Violet not blue. Also I'm a realist and your grandmother is going to die soon

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What did Luigi say to Mario? You look like a fat Mexican

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Q: What did the lesbian say to her partner? A: We cannot get married in forty five states.

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

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twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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