What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure _._._

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

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What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops