Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

What do you find in a pile of dead babies? ************************************************ A dead baby.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

among liedbtt is my Captcha code

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

I work at jcpenny

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

Carrot fingers

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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