A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

Once upon a time, people died. It was happening all over the land. They didn't LIVE happily ever after... since they died. The end... for them.

what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

Three women are sent to heaven. Theres a blond , brunette , and a redhead. There are 100 steps to heaven and on every step god tells you a joke and you cant laugh. The redhead makes it to step 23 then laughs. The brunette makes it to step 67 then laughs. Finally the blond make it all the way to the 100th step and before god can tell the joke she laughs. God asks why are u laughing? And the blond says " i just got the 1st one"!

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

A woman went outside for some fresh air.

Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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