Why did the chicken cross the road Because the farmer is obviously to stupid to build a proper chicken coop, and thus his chicken is crossing the road and will most likely be hit by a car

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So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

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what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

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Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So it could cause traffic accidents.

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Women's rights.

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roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

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Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? feel the other side of the worm in his mouth

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Roses are red Violets are blue Call the cops girl They can't unrape you

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops