Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Once upon a time there was a pure and beautiful girl who lived with her step-mother and her two step-sisters. They made her live in the basement and had her do all the chores while they went to parties. Then social workers came and relocated her to a foster family.

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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lucas sehnoun told me anti-joke was funny

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What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

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Justin Beiber is a good singer

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world society

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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Why did the black man almost go to jail? He rolled a 6 in monopoly, if it was a 7, he would've been sent straight to jail without passing "go"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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