- Anti Joke

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

A black guy and a white guy are arguing over what race god is. So they go to god and ask what race he is. They never got their answer, because god doesn't exist.

what is chuck norris's favorite food? lasagna.

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did not. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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