Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

a man walks into a bar, he tells the bartender "im not a part of this SYSTEM"

hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...