What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

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Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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THIS ONE IS MIIINE THIS ONE IS MIIINE I AM TOTALLY TIFA I AM TOTALLY TIFA! This one apparently.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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who killed more poeple than jeffory dommer, john wayne gayce, and ted buny combined cancer

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

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Shltskc gw? G

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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