Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

black people

whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

feminism

Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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