So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

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What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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A man walked into a bar. He said ow.

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

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Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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