How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

what does I.C.T mean when a teacher says it it means I cant teach

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

Q: Why was the gorrilla arrested? A: He broke a law.

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

Q: Why does a hamburger doesn't taste like an ice cream? A: Because.

How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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