She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

Bryson got a concussion...he died

what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

What's endangered like the Spotted Owl? A Cancer patient.

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

What did the Ginger get for his birthday? A soul...................................……................……………•

why is my phone broken i dropped it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...