"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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What sound does a dog make? WOOF What sound does a cat make? MEOW What sound does a giraffe make? ...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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What did the Asian, the black man and the jew have in common? To be honest i really don't know.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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