how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

why are black people good at sports? because i f***ed your mom

i Have read and agreed to the terms of service

how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

there was once a jew

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Assuming the fact that these children are in fact deceased, it would be highly inprobable that they could perform any task. Or that they would need to see any light at all, since the point of that dark room is to keep them concealed.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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