How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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If you are reading this you are a nerd

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Why are Anti-jokes funny? Coz they are not.

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

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Why are white people white? I don't know

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

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being sober in a bar fight

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How does a man with no arms ride a bicycle? He can't, he loses control and falls over, getting a few scrapes and bruises.

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What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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Major League Soccer

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops