Ps. I am getting green thumbs, which is weird, I never even expected for anyone to even bother to read my fucking long comments,but then again... As my wife said, " I am not pissed at the fact that members of my movement dont depend too much of my advice in order to get along in life for nothing". True, while horsehead network might mock me, and my "blood family hate and/or fear me" It takes only a look into my wife`s eyes to feel like a God... All while I got many thousand members of Neronism worldwide waiting for me to cope with my past so they can worship me (which pisses me off, it was never my intention, I give them life advice on how to shape their own life, not on how to cling to me). Nero: Neronism, look it up, join me, stop looking for the answers in religion, but stand up for yourself and realize that there is no reason to wait for life after death, when we together, can create heaven on earth. Yes esteemed members, I am back on my feet, and I am wearing my ortopedic arm made of steel again, consider it symbolism. Its free btw, your money is worthless to me, if you choose to see life for what it is in the eyes of a true human being, then you on the other hand, are worth as much as I am... What I am worth is something I will leave up to your opinion, because sure as fuck if I dont consider myself better than people most already. Its time to push forward again, led by a fist of steel.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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Q. What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? A. I don't were cleats when I jump on my trampoline.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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