Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's red and invisible? We don't know that it's red.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Ask me if I'm a tree? Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

thumb_up thumb_down -26

We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call an African-American, Latino, Asian, and Canadian all on the same football team? A reasonably diverse group of teammates who are most likely good acquaintances.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops