Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

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Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

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A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the paralympics? Walking.

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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