So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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Smoke weed till i die nigga

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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What comes after Friday? A ?.

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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Whats worse than a man who has had a hard day at work, he goes to a bar and gets drunk, he goes home and beats his wife? I his wife was fat and had cancer

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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Knock Knock DAMMIT WOMAN MAKE ME A SAMMACH

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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