Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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STOP BULLYING FAT PEOPLE. They have enough on their plate

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

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So a guy walks in to a bar.... and orders a beer.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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Oh, go away

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

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If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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What did the loser say to the winner? Good game

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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