Nickelback

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

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What's black and white and red all over? A plague victim.

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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What's worse than a papercut? Dying

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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