guy walks into a bar, ouch

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo Don't worry I'll be there too! Not in the cage But laughing at you! ??

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a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

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Mary- Hey Dallas, do you have a suitcase? Dallas- Yeah, why? Mary- I need a suitcase

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

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teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

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a blonde walks into a drycleaning store to get her clothes and on her way out the empoyee behind her says come again and then the blonde says shut up u nosy bitch its just toothpaste this time!!!

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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