Did you hear the one about the flying turtle? No? Okay I'll tell you about it. So one day there was a flying turtle. His name was Larry and he was a turtle that can fly. However, nobody believed that Larry can fly and he wanted to prove it. So the next day George, who was a flying octopus, called Jerry on his cell phone and told him a story about a Larry. Jerry, who was a media reporter, was so offended by his story and called the police. Question: What did the police say? Nothing because it was a made up story

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

WHY DO IDIOTS RIGHT STUPID JOKES BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH THERE LIVES.

knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

What is not a car park? Clash of clans

Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

Boy: what to hear a joke? girl: sure. Boy: woman rights.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What did the boy get from his grandmother on Christmas. Nothing she died on Thanksgiving.

When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

Why so serious ?

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

What's the difference between contemporary Christian music?

Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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