Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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12 niqqa 12.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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batman farted so hes retarded

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What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops