- Anti Joke

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

True or false , is it hotter in the summer or in the city? False, because blue monkeys don't eat orangutan bones.

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

Knock Knock! Who's there?! Michelle Bachman.

What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

A man walks into a bar with his dog. He orders 14 shots and proceeds to drink. For each shot he takes, he feeds one to his dog, who accepts it willingly. The bartender says "Well I've never seen anything stranger. Why did you order 14 shots, and why are you giving half to your dog." "Well," says the man, "my 14 year old dog was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition. I cannot afford to put him down, so the shots should kill him." The dog then dies.

Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

Geeks have girlfriends...................... . . . I MEAN alien friends (geeks are losers and you decide your a geek or not)

David: Hey Bill. Do you know what the most common place for a Democrat to work is? Bill: No. David: An insane Asylum, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a black person to work is? Bill: No. David: A prison, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a 20th centrury undercover German Jew to work is? Bill: No. David: A morge, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a Scientologist to work is? Bill: No. David: With Democrats. (Writen by Ben, avid Anti-Scienctologist)

A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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