Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

thumb_up thumb_down -1

True or false , is it hotter in the summer or in the city? False, because blue monkeys don't eat orangutan bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down -1

even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the difference between an empty bucket and a bucket of water? The Water.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock who's there? your destiny

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops