so a man walks into a bar..... and says ouch.

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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A skinny white prisoner dropped his soap in the shower. So the big, ripped, black prisoner who was showering next to him picked up the soap and handed it back to him. The skinny white prisoner said "Thank you" and continued with his shower.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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If i knew people where coming i would have trimed my antlers

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There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

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What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

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What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

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Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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An American, a Canadian, and a Scottish man died in a horrible car accident. Their story was used as a lesson to keep teenagers from drunk driving.

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Q:What's better than getting 500 million dollars A:Nothing

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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wanna hear a better joke? casey.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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