what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

How high is the sky? True or False

what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

If gluttony is a serious sin, why are so many Christians fat? Because they have bad eating habits.

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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