Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

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Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

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what did the British horse say to the man who owned him? nothing all he sad was neigh.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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I? Everett

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

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Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first? So you can see the expression on its face...

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops