a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was six afraid of 7? Because 7 was a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Transformers: Shadow of the Dark Risen Monday. The Autobots starring in more explosions, more random fighting! Zero narrative nor explanations! One constant explosion trough the whole movie! But do not worry! Did you believe that the final battle versus Optimus Prime and his evil Dimensional counterpart Optimal Evilus would be the ones fighting at standing at the end? NO! This is far more exciting! 16 year old Nick is seeking the love of his life in the 42 year old grandmother Mirabella Torres, and ends up proving his love by pushing the button that instantly kills Optimal Evilus`s ultimate form Evilus Supreme! "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Honest reviews. "Yeah we love it that part where Optimus Prime forgets who is fighting and beats the shit out of Jazz and his totally non racist MonkeyBot Obamabus, seriously, this needs to die" Transformers lovers. "You gotta love that scene where Megatron starts blowing up his own allies because explosions!" Transformersmoviefans.com. "So why did Optimus Prime refuse to kill his Evil dimensional brother thing? I mean he was from another dimension, why did he go around like "NO HE IS MY BROTHER IN SOME DIMENSION! YOU MUST INSERT THE SPARK INSIDE ME DEEP INSIDE ME NICKY! DEEPER!" People Magazine. "So this time they just made the Decepticon`s weakness a button so small only a human can push it huh?" People... Just people. "MY EAAAAAAAAARSSSS!" MICHAELBAYGAVEMEPTSD.ORG. Moral: Wow it says skynet is watching all the time now at solvemedia, unexpected considering the first thing I posted was the terminator XXXV thing. So, is it some sort of easter egg feature? I mean I would not believe myself if someone told me that.... Which is actually what makes this kinda creepy...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

thumb_up thumb_down +7

yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do u call a cripple Biv

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black person who can't see? Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops