What's black, white and red all over? A dead panda

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

Boxing on Boxing Day

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

Why shouldn't I go out today? Well I haven't done any work today. Actually no. It's not that. I'd have to ask my guardian Sally to bring out the wheelchair, and well, I'm afraid of her. She beats me. My hobbies are playing football, watching Loose Women and looking at pictures of Gary Barlow on Google Images.

Women's Soccer.

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with other men other than her husband.

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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