Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

What's red, blue & green all over?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

Nickleback.

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

Have you ever seen that really famous blind man's house? Neither has he.

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...