Yo mamma's so fat, we are all seriously concerned for her health.

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Screw it you write the joke.

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? You might spill your beer

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

what ate all the ants in the hill? an anteater

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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