Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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