What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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WHAT DO YOU CALL SOMEONE HAVING A MYOCARDIAL INFARCTION? Dead

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AFTER PONDERING UPON YOUR SUGGESTION... I HAVE CONSIDERED, THOUGHT, SOUGHT TROUGH THE YELLOW PAGES OF WISDOM AND MIGHT, AND MY ANSWER TO THAT SUGGESTION IS... A DEFINITIVE, FIRM AND MANLY... Moral: MAAAAYBEEEEE?!?!?

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Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the capital of Hungary? Thirtsy

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Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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Ben Corbishley

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Neither did she.

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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What does greg and Ian have in common?

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops