A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

Caca.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

Chris Bosh's neck

Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Hello, nice to meet you.

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

why did the dog eat its breakfast of meat because he was hungry

A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

Q.How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A.You don't. You kill her.

A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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