A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

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if girls witth big boobs work at hooters where does the girl with one leg work.... walmart

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Stephen Hawking

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What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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A cockroach walks into a bar. The bar seems to have a pest problem.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

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Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

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there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

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what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

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So a blonde walks into a wall...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

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How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops