Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? It has been this way for two days now. Whenever he looks over his shoulder and past his wing, he can see them there. Following him. The men with the red eyes. He doesn't know what they want and doesn't want to find out. He crosses that road as he has crossed so many others recently, squawking and shuffling along on his stubby legs, darting through traffic in a risky effort to shake them off of his tailfeathers. He gets to the other side and ascends the curb, walking beak-first into a pair of legs hidden beneath a grey robe. He looks up and sees a pair of eyes like burning coals staring down at him from within the darkness of a hood. He tries to run, but it is too late. He has been taken. His wings and fingers are forfeit.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's black and white and read all over? A lot of things.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Shaq do when he first met Rondo? Play Basketball

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why didn't the boy cross the road? Because there was traffic moving at high speed and he didn't want to be paralyzed from the waist down

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Needless to say he received a bath that night.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock CUM IN!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a zebra without stripes? A stripeless zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops