A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse than failing a test Drowning

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You know what's cool? Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

If I was trapped in a closet with you and a bear, and I only had two bullets, I would shoot you twice!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock-knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Cat ate a battery, did volts.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops