What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

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How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

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A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

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yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

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How did the blind man end up in the hospital? He didnt see the bus coming.

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what porn does a nugget watch nugget porn.

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

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Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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