Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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What's worst than a holocaust 2 holocaust's

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Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

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Gus's mom

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being dragged to his death by an 18 wheeler.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Ebola How about you?

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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why couldnt helen keller drive she was a woman

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You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What happens if George Washington is still alive? World population increases by 1

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops